What a Wick the last 7 days in 19 (4th – 10th September, 2010)

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Scientists have developed a scan that can measure the brain’s maturity level; I consider that quite a handy tool. We can use it to scan potential spouses, individuals considering running for office, and even those thinking of becoming parents.

It would be quite beneficial if this scanner were able to identify other brain activities as well. This would probably allow a better understanding of each of the following events…

  1. The US pastor who publicized his intention to burn Korans on the anniversary of the September 11 terror attacks incited outrage within the US and overseas.  Obama described the pastor’s proposed move as a ‘recruitment bonanza for al Qaeda’.
  2. Fidel Castro admitted that Cuba’s communist model does not work.
  3. Scientists found that women are attracted to certain types of dance moves in men. A woman finds it sexy when a man’s dance routine consists of flamboyant movements of his neck, torso and right knee.
  4. Romanian lawmakers tried targeting witches and fortunetellers to generate more revenue through taxation. They attempted to pass a law requiring those professionals to produce receipts and to accept responsibility for wrong predictions.
  5. The following was found in the diary of a slain Jamaican gangster: “My isolation from society gets farther each year. For now I am at ease but for me things are subject to change anytime. I should really write a book but I couldn’t be real honest so it wouldn’t be a best seller.”
  6. A German farmer opened a “milk filling station.” It’s opened all day, everyday for those in desperate need of milk.
  7. A Chinese woman is suing a cinema for wasting her time, as she had to sit through 20 minutes of commercials before the start of the movie.
  8. A South African pastor delivered a sermon entitled “Jesus was HIV positive”. He claimed that he did it to fight the stigma attached to HIV and AIDS, but many Christians took offense nonetheless.
  9. During a recent performance, Wyclef attacked those who had not supported his for the Haitian presidency. “If I was president….I got a message for Sean Penn, maybe he ain’t see me in Haiti because he was too busy sniffing cocaine. I got a message for Praswell, even though you don’t want to support me, I got love for you, even though you only kicked 8 bars for the Fugees.”

10. A German company fired a man for the theft of two cents worth of electricity; he had recharged his vehicle (a Segway) for an hour and a half on the company’s premises. A court ruled the dismissal unfair.

11. A new study found that men who frequent the gym are more likely to climax prematurely, and that fat men tend to last longer.

12. When US police arrested a man they discovered US $1500 tied to his scrotum using a shoelace.

13. It is alleged that a Jamaican businessman ordered 16 men to beat and stab a customer who had called him a fool.

14. Twelve American soldiers have been accused of killing Afghan civilians and collecting their fingers as trophies.

15. A Tasmanian science teacher used the same needle to take blood samples from 18 students to conduct a blood experiment in class. The government is liable if any of those students contracts a virus as a result.

16. A US professor who started a 30-day junk food marathon on Aug. 25 has lost seven pounds so far. He has been eating only high-calorie, high-fat foods.

17. Taiwanese police pooled money to buy a bicycle for a thief who’d stolen one to enable his daughter to get to school.

18. Japan can’t locate 230 000 centenarian.

19. A British boxer refuses to apologize for a phrase he’d used to convey his level of confidence in overcoming an opponent in an upcoming fight; he’d predicted that the fight would be “as one-sided as a gang-rape”.

Consider yourselves up to speed…

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